Directions to the Metro
by Kreuz Swords
Summary: For some odd reason, Tsuzuki and Hisoka get lost. New, Chap. 4 A bit part for Muraki-san near the end ^_~
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own YnM and I made no money from writing this, but the humor is mine.

Title: Directions to the Metro

Author: Kreuz Swords

Note: I do share YnM web site. http://unicorn_san.tripod.com/ 

Two shinigami from Meifu once went to the city (Tokyo) to go sightseeing and get some souvenirs. One shinigami, named Hisoka, was in his teens with green eyes and blond hair. The other was a young man with black hair and vivid violet eyes. His name was Tsuzuki. They started walking around the Tsukiji Fish Market to the Hibiya section, on toward the Harajuku section to see the art museums. Hisoka and Tsuzuki saw the latest fashion trends and historical sites. They stopped and had lunch at a café. When they were finished eating, they found some souvenirs for the Chief. 

Still wandering around, they marveled at the fashions that the teenagers wore and dyed hair. Tsuzuki picked up more food to eat. They walked on and up a hill to the Imperial Palace, which they rested for awhile there. The sun slowly went down in the sky and the buildings glowed.

When night came, electric signs and streetlights made the city glitter. The lights from homes looked like fireflies on the tall buildings. Tsuzuki and Hisoka started to head back to where they had begun, but they had wandered and turned a lot due to Tsuzuki's endless search for food. Hisoka discovered that they had lost their way, and it was late into the night.

After a while, Hisoka ringed a doorbell to ask for directions to the metro before Tsuzuki panicked and called on his shikigami for help which would wake the whole neighborhood up. A beautiful woman answered the door, and they were stunned by her beauty. The lady seemed to be unhappy, and she looked like she had been crying with puffy eyes. Hisoka felt great loneliness from her. When they remained silent, she said, "Yes, may I help you?"

"Um… to see the master of the house", answered Tsuzuki dumbly.

"Oh dear," and she started crying again. "You should not have come to this unfortunate house. Please go back home." 

"But we cannot," whined Tsuzuki.

"If you value your lives, leave at once and I will not think of you as cowards."

Hisoka spoke up, "Sorry to disturb you ma'am, but…"

"We are hopelessly lost and starving to death!!" cried Tsuzuki and wept on Hisoka's shoulder.

TBC, will they find their way home, or will I get enough reviews to continue… :P


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: In this one, I don't own Kerowyn, which Mercedes Lackey does. I needed a guardian, but couldn't make up a good one. Zena is not mine either.

Title: Directions to the Metro

Author: Kreuz Swords

Note: Someone gave home to this fic. ^-^ I do share YnM web site. http://unicorn_san.tripod.com/

Hisoka used all his will power to remain calm and not beat up his partner as the lady stopped crying and made a dumbfounded expression and blinked owlishly at them. "Now that is a new one for me, said the lady. "Is your friend on any medication?" she whispered to Hisoka.

"No, he is always this emotional." and pushed Tsuzuki off his shoulder.

"So, do you really want to see the master?"

"Not if you can give us directions to the metro, ma'am," said Hisoka.

"Sorry, I am not allowed to leave the house and I do not know where the metro is." The lady invited them in, and they took off their shoes. She then showed them to a screen door and went off crying again.

"She sure is sad a lot. I wish I could cheer her up," said Tsuzuki. He slid the door open and they walked into the room.

By the fireplace, a blonde woman warrior was cooking ramen for a late night snack. The female fighter had on light armor and a long sword on her back. She heard the two shinigami as they came in and pulled out her sword, and said, "It never fails! Every time I to cook something, someone shows up! Now, who let you two in at this hour! 

"Ahhh, it's Zena!! We are doomed," screamed Tsuzuki as he cowered behind Hisoka.

"Baka, Zena is not a blonde," mumbled Hisoka.

"Huh?" said the warrior.

"We wanted to talk to the master of the house. Are you the owner of this home?" spoke Hisoka.

Li'ha'eer (By the gods) no! I am Captain Kerowyn, and the guardian. If you have came to see the master, my orders are to kick out any challengers who come." And, her companion, a blue-eyed, white horse, showed its head at a window to the courtyard. "Now, defend yourselves!"

"This is the strangest day I have ever been in! Unless you can give us directions to the metro, so we don't have to fight you," said an irritated Hisoka.

"Eh, sorry kid. I don't know what a metro is. Humm…Is that like a magic gate or something?"

Fine! FINE! We might as well sleep in this room for the night!" snapped Hisoka.

"Soo, your not here to challenge me to see the master?"

"No, my partner got us lost and it is late at night!" Hisoka turned his head to glare at his partner. "Tsuzuki? Drat, where did he wander off to now?!" He looked behind Kerowyn and saw Tsuzuki in inu form drooling over the bubbling pot of ramen.

Kerowyn turned around to see what the kid was fuming at and saw Tsuzuki. "Err…Are you hungry?" Tsuzuki's growling stomach was his only reply. (Author: My, Tsuzuki sure has a bottomless stomach. I saw him eat two large pizzas and two whole apple pies for dinner.) 

"Anyway, a pretty lady who was crying let us in. What was she crying about by the way?" asked Hisoka.

"Oh, about the freeloaders who come here to marry her had challenged me and all got their butts kick out."

"Her father must have high standards to have you to get rid of her dates," said Hisoka.

"Those deadbeats just wanted to marry her for the money and ruling power over half of Japan." 

"Don't tell me she is a princess. What is this, am I in some kind of distorted fairytale?"

"You guessed it kid," and she sheathed her sword. "She is a princess and her father is a great sorcerer who placed an enchantment on this place many years ago. We never age here, and I don't even know how I got here myself. No challenger has been able to pass me since I became the guardian."

"Who would want to merry an enchanted girl in this day and age?" questioned Hisoka as he wandered over to Tsuzuki.

"Well, since you are here and need a place to stay, I guess I can let you two spend the night as my guests."

"Can we eat now sword lady?" begged Tsuzuki.

Kerowyn got out bowls and chopsticks and fed her guests. As they were eating, Tsuzuki told her of the good times he had with Hisoka while Kerowyn told him of her times with the mercenary group called, Skybolts and fighting. The topic change to what was the best alcohol drink of either rice or with fruit. All three grew tired and went down to sleep.

Later, the fire burned out. A cold breeze came into the room, and Tsuzuki shivered and woke up. "Geez, why don't they have a floor heater in here?" He saw the other two sleeping peacefully. Tsuzuki crawled over to his partner and shook Hisoka's shoulder. "Hisoka-kun, can I curl up next to you and share our body warmth because I am really cold in this drafty room."

"Baka…" mumbled Hisoka and hits Tsuzuki square in the face with a book. Tsuzuki stumbles backwards into a corner and sulks.

"How mean, even in his sleep he still calls me a baka and hits me," whined Tsuzuki. " I wonder were he hides a book on his thin frame." He thought he might be able to find a blanket on his own, so he moved the door open. Tsuzuki found himself in a maze of hallways until he came upon a sliding door that had a faint light glowing from within.

TBC…What is behind door number two for Tsuzuki, or will I stop posting new chapters due to lack of reviews? =P


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: In this chapter, I do not own part of the riddle.

Title: Directions to the Metro

Author: Kreuz Swords

Note: Oh yes, I am still writing this story.

Tsuzuki quietly moved the sliding door and entered into a spacious room filled with rows of shelves and more coved the walls. The shelves reached up to the ceiling. Books, scrolls, and sheets of paper were everywhere in the shelves, stacks, and piles on the floor. Tsuzuki was amazed in the slight darkness that there seem to be no end to the wooden shelves. He thought there were more books here than in Meifu's library.

Tsuzuki carefully walked through the room to the source of the light to a table with a gray haired old lady trying to read with tired eyes in the faint candlelight. The old lady did not notice him as he came up to the table.

"Excuse me, Ma'am," spoke Tsuzuki. 

The old woman was startled and knocked over a large pile of books and papers. "Ahh, an oni!" she cried, and the tumbling pile buried Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki slowly dislodged himself from the mess and said, "Um, are you the home owner here?"

"Oh good, you are not an oni. No, I am not the master, but I am the lonely librarian. Come to think of it, you are the only one to get this far."

"Do you have an extra blanket that I could borrow, Please?"

"A blanket?! Those who come here want to pass the maze. Now, I need to find a riddle for you to answer first." She got up and took her candle up close to a bookshelf. The old woman tried to read what was on the bindings in the flickering light. "Drat, why does ink fade on me and making it harder to make out the book titles," she mumbled.

"All I wanted was an extra blanket," whined Tsuzuki, "But it is too cold to sleep in the other room I was in."

"Who cares about being cold when you want to see the master. You need your mind's knowledge and wit."

"I really do want a blanket, or a floor heater," complained Tsuzuki.

The librarian went though some books and scrolls. "Oh, now I remember where I put the riddle book at!" She scurried to another shelf and pulled out an old worn book. The old woman flipped over the pages. "Darn this faint light. It makes my eyes hurt. How is one supposed to find things in this darkness? I wish I had something that gave more light."

"Umm... Maybe, I should get my partner because I am not good in solving riddles. He said that I am...."

"Nonsense! Here is the riddle, and you will meet the master when you give the correct answer. Now, listen up." The old woman tried to make out the very faint writing. "I proceed until I am no more, but there I am behind me once again."

Tsuzuki thought for a while and answered, "Hisoka-kun."

"What? No, never mind, it is a wave."

"Are you really positive? Hisoka-kun usually walks in front of me. And, when I do something dumb, he always hits me from behind."

The librarian was speechless for a moment. "In truth, I cannot read the answer, but it should be a wave"

"Hisoka-kun really does act that way."

"I guess it would be a good answer. Some other things can fit the riddle's description. I could write down Hisoka and you would be correct, and I could tell you where the master is." The old woman did just that.

TBC, Fufufufuu, what will be behind door # 3, or will I give up on this story due to lack of reviews?  =P


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Directions to the Metro

Author: Kreuz Swords

Disclaimer: Poe's _The Raven_ little remark.

Note: If I get 5 or more reviews, I write another story

Tsuzuki followed the old librarian's directions through the tricky hallways. He made it to the master's sliding door. He stepped into the room and saw a fireplace with a brightly burning flame and noticed the piles of treasure surrounding the fireplace in the large room. There were weapons, jewels, fancy clothes, money, gold and silver objects, and common useful things. 

The flame became taller and boomed out, "What you desire is here to take!"

"Oh okay, thanks." Tsuzuki found some blankets quickly. He hunted up a violet kerchief, a lamp, and a bottle of plum wine. "Um, do you have a street map with directions to the metro here, Mr. Flame?"

"In the right corner next to the collection of Plastic Tree CDs (Japanese rock band), and don't call me Mr. Flame."

Tsuzuki picked up the map and wandered back to the library. He gave the lamp to the old lady, so she wouldn't have to strain her eyes in the candlelight anymore. Tsuzuki went back to the room with his partner. He found that Hisoka had moved off his blanket in his sleep and was curled up for warmth. The tall man set back his partner's blanket with loving care. Tsuzuki quietly returned to his spot on the mat and went back to sleep with an extra blanket over him.

In the morning, Tsuzuki gave the sword lady the bottle of plum wine, and surprised Hisoka with the street map. The violet eyed man and his partner greeted the beautiful lady on their way out. Tsuzuki handed the violet kerchief and said, "Take your tears away and cry no more. Our tale here was not a doomed one. The master was really kind and we were not killed while we stayed." He went passed her with his partner and opened the door.

"Wait!" said the beautiful lady. "If you saw my father, I must marry you."

"Marriage!!" said Tsuzuki and Hisoka in unison as they stepped away from her in horror. 

"Yes beloved!" and she tore off her black robes to reveal a wedding gown and put on a veil. 

Tsuzuki swept up Hisoka over his shoulder. "Bye, bye now! Thank you for letting us stay for the night." He then dashed out the door. 

The lady picked up her skirt and chased after them. "Come back my husband to be!"

"Sorry pretty lady, you wouldn't like it with my low paying job, and everything dark and dreary on a midnight weary!"

"Nevermore," said Hisoka.

"We are fated to be together, forever!"

Tsuzuki ran passed a tall, silver haired man, but unfortunately the lady ran over this man in her flight. (KS: Me bad at Muraki bashing ^__^;)

"Hisoka-kun! Tell me the directions to the metro!"

Hisoka pulled open the map while on his partner's shoulder. "Turn left on the next street!" His partner turned right. "Baka, I said turn Left!" and he smacked Tsuzuki with the map.

"Sorry...!" and Tsuzuki ran back to the correct street. They were able to get away from the lady and retuned to home safely. Watari was pleased to get his souvenir of Hello Kitty rice cooker and 003's music CD of _Sounds of the Redwood Forest_. 

THE END

The moral of this story is: Always remember the directions to the metro, or don't let Tsuzuki get you lost =P


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